Understanding the “Third Shift” in the Perinatal Period
During the perinatal period, which includes pregnancy through the first year postpartum and even beyond, many parents experience what’s known as the “third shift.” Beyond the demands of paid work, pregnancy, birth, newborn care, and basic self-care, there’s an often invisible layer of emotional and mental labour.
This includes tracking feedings, managing schedules and appointments, researching baby gear, coordinating support, and carrying the emotional weight of the household. For many parents, this mental load is constant and exhausting.
Why the Mental Load Can Feel So Overwhelming After Baby
This labour is rarely acknowledged, yet deeply felt. Over time, it can contribute to feelings of overwhelm, anxiety, guilt, relational disconnection, and resentment, especially when paired with:
- Sleep deprivation
- Shifts in identity, roles, and responsibilities
- Hormonal changes during pregnancy and postpartum
Many parents describe feeling like they’re holding everything together behind the scenes, without space to rest or be supported themselves.
How Perinatal Therapy Can Help Parents Feel Supported
Therapy can be a vital space for parents to process these emotions and feel seen in a role that’s often invisible. Working with a perinatal psychotherapist can help validate and normalize the mental load many parents carry, while offering practical and emotional support.
Therapy may help you:
- Reduce burnout and emotional overload
- Create boundaries around rest, relationships, and expectations
- Reconnect with parts of yourself that feel lost or stretched thin
- Explore identity changes during pregnancy and postpartum
Letting Go of “Doing It All”
Perinatal therapy also creates space to gently unpack societal pressures around “the good mother” or the expectation to “do it all.” These narratives can be deeply ingrained and isolating.
In therapy, you can give voice to the parts of you that feel unseen, conflicted, or overwhelmed, and begin to redefine what support, care, and balance look like for you and your family.
You Don’t Have to Navigate the Perinatal Period Alone
If you’re feeling this way, you are not alone, and you don’t have to carry it by yourself. Therapy during the perinatal period can offer a lifeline, helping you move from simply surviving to feeling more supported, grounded, and connected to yourself.
The “third shift” is real, and it can feel heavy and isolating. Therapy can help you feel seen, supported, and less alone as you navigate the emotional load of parenthood.
At Oona, perinatal mental health care is rooted in collaboration and compassion, with experienced practitioners working together to support you through tender feelings and significant life transitions. If you’re interested in exploring therapy, you can learn more about Kimberley Orton, RP (Qualifying) and book a free 15-minute meet-and-greet consultation with her or any of our other mental health practitioners.
